The Hook... What If?

The moment I woke up and rolled over in the morning,  I knew I was in for a battle. I had been challenging those around me to set their minds on the things of the Lord and today was going to be my day  to practice what I had been "preaching."

Our cafe' hit an all time low the day before. It was strange because Friday's had always been one of our best days. I went to bed saying all the right things to one of my partners, my daughter, but I awoke with her concerns.

It started as a low rumble as a "what if?" As the morning progressed the "what ifs" became full on sentences. What if I misunderstood the leading of the Lord? What if the cafe' fails? What if I'm stuck with a debt-load and no way to pay it?

Before I left my house to fulfill my shift, I knew I was in a true "head on" battle.  On my way in, I was reminded of something I had recently read... fear robs us of faith. Yes! I was becoming consumed in fear and the "what ifs" were my hook. My faith was depleting and fear was becoming a crippling monster.

It is up to me to choose what I will allow to consume my mind. The Holy Spirit bubbled scripture up from within,

     For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds
     casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God
     BRINGING EVERY THOUGHT INTO CAPTIVITY to the obedience of Christ- 2 Cor. 10:4-6a

I decided that I was not going to stay in that place of fear. I also wasn't going to base my day, my thoughts, and actions on the fears of "what if?" I was gonna grab a  hold of that hook and cast it into the sea!

As I listened to worship music I had to force myself to sing. Somewhere within myself I was comfortable with the fears, perhaps because I had established a familiarity with it long ago. But as a growing believer, I knew I didn't want to stay there - I wasn't going to stay there. I then decided it was time for me to to talk to God. I began by thanking Him for the opportunity to have a business, to be able to be where we are, and to be called by Him for such a time as this to work with two other generations. In prayer, my focus began to shift! I began to I to apply the principals of authority I had been learning, "In Christ I don't have to submit to fear, I submit to faith! I do not relinquish the leading of the Lord. I know I have been called there for this time and this season. I will focus on the vision and let God be my provision!"  I went on and on and proclaimed God's goodness. Slowly the fear began to melt. I pressed in further. I began to pray for the other stores in our galleria. I realized they too were feeling the pinch. I continued to pray my way to work. Before I knew it,  my half hour ride was complete.

As soon as my foot hit the threshold of the store, I knew, that I knew, that I knew, I was where I belonged. As the day unfolded, I watched God work in the natural realm as well as the spiritual realm. Our sales went up and so did a few prayers. Most of all, the faith which God established in me arose once again and the fears disappeared. I felt peace in my soul and the confidence that God is our provider was re-established.

The "what ifs" shifted. "What if God called me here to enjoy this season with my spiritual mom and daughter? What if God wants me here to be connected to the people at the store? What if this new thing we're doing makes it possible for others dreams to come true? By faith the hook was thrown back to me, by the greatest fisherman of all time, and was baited with the victory side of "what ifs!"

God Bless!
Deborah :)

Forgiveness vs Reconciliation

Have you ever heard of the cliché, “forgive and forget?” I heard this statement growing up but I couldn’t get myself to agree with it. Even as a dedicated Christ believing adult, I just can’t accept these words.

I discovered the reason why.

In my mind, I would have to become friends with the offender once more and accept their behavior. Yet, the words, “Not again,” would ring true in my heart as I would watch them repeat their behavior to others. As much as I would be willing to allow Christ to work in my heart to forgive, I couldn’t forget what they had done. I wouldn’t want to put myself in their line of fire any longer. Without Christ revealing truth in their lives, I would never be able to come to a place of reconciliation. Yes, I could forgive but I couldn’t reconcile and forget.

To forgive is to release the offender from your desire to have repayment for their wrong doing. This God given instruction is something you choose to obey, "And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive him, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses," (Mark 11:14). In the hardest situations you will discover by the grace of God, you are able to forgive and have healing.

Reconciliation takes two parties surrendered to God's way for healing. Both sides recognize the offense. The offender must realize what they have done and apologize for their wrong doing before the relationship can be mended. The victim also needs to accept their apology. Reconciliation takes effort and deliberate work from both parties. With God working in both hearts, it's possible. In time, creating new and better memories will overcome the past and forgetting the offense will become easier.

Unfortunately, there are times that the offender does not come to a place of seeking an apology. It's even possible they take their unrepentant behaviors to the grave, which is between them and God. Never the less, you can walk in peace as you have been obedient to do your part and trust the Lord is working on the situation.

In a perfect world, we all would get along nicely and nobody would get hurt. Since we do not live in a perfect world, there are people who offend and justify their behavior. Sometimes their offenses are downright abusive. It’s nearly impossible to reconcile with someone who continues to bring harm. It’s best to pray for them,"Bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you,”(Matt 6:28). In time, the offender may come to terms with their actions and seek your forgiveness. I’ve heard many stories whereby the offender had the revelation of Christ and they were able to apologize to their victims. Once they sought forgiveness, it gave room for reconciliation. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation,” (2Cor 5:17&18).

It’s important to remember two things about forgiveness vs reconciliation:

Forgiveness is between you and God as you choose to be in obedience to His instruction.

Reconciliation is between you, the offender, and God. Each one works together to have the victory of reconciliation.

Once an offense has taken place, you can’t go back in time to change what has happened. However, you can change the outcome by allowing Christ to work in you. It's important to forgive. But forgetting requires a healing process which often comes hand in hand with reconciliation and rebuilding the relationship.

Sometimes it’s hard to know how to pray for our offender. Here’s an example, but remember it’s not just the words you speak to God; it’s your heart that’s most important:

“Dear Lord, thank you for giving me the courage to forgive (you give name). I ask that you help them understand what they have done (and are possibly still doing). Help me to be kind in their presence as I wait upon you Lord~Amen.”

God Bless!

Deborah